Okay, I'll admit it. This weeks weigh-in was tough to take. I worked out everyday, but one this week. Watched how much I ate and when I ate it. I worked out extra hard Wednesday night. I rode 5 miles, plus added the stuff I did Tuesday on top of that. I didn't eat nothing on Thursday and worked out right before I went. I was expecting another great result like last week. In my mind I was expecting at least a 10 pound loss. The moment came and I stepped on the scale.... 1.4 lbs. I lost only 1.4 lbs! I was devastated! I told my wife, "I can poop more than that! I'm a 400 lb. man and I only lost1.4 lbs. in a week? That's horrible!" Immediately she went on the defense. "That don't mean nothing! You've been exercising for a week. You're building muscle. You're breathing better. You get around better. That 1.4 lbs don't mean nothing." I didn't want to hear it. I was mad, and I wanted to be miserable. I sat there in my chair and kept to myself. Inside, I was talking to myself. "What's the point of this? You just need to leave and go eat a cheeseburger!" I was having a self-pity party, and I was the only one invited.
The meeting started, but my mind was elsewhere. I just wanted it over. I wanted to just go and eat and drown my sorrows in some food. I texted my trainer, Jared, and told him how it went. He encouraged me to not give up. I wanted to. I told him I wasn't. As our sponsor, Nancy, started talking, she talked about going beyond the scale. What else to look at other than the weight loss. She asked for examples. People started saying, " I exercise more! I'm building muscle! I'm breathing better!" Wait a minute, my wife just told me that! As I listened, I heard other people talk about what it meant to them. Their clothes fitting better. They're eating better. They have more energy. Some of this started to sink in. Melody spoke up and said that is what she had been telling me. She already has noticed a difference in my breathing. I'll admit it that I'm enjoying that part. I no longer sound like the kid in a wheelchair from Malcolm in the Middle. Talk.. and... pause.. between... breaths. I have been enjoying the way you look for a healthier way to eat. It's like a treasure hunt to me. Try to find a different way of eating at some place where I would've gorged myself before. Example, we ate at Long John Silvers/A&W today. Melody ate baked fish and a salad. I got a piece of fish, and three pieces of shrimp. Instead of fries and coleslaw, I ate unbuttered corn, green beans, a side salad with no dressing and unsweet tea. Normally, I would've eaten twice that much and drank a A&W Root Beer. I rode a bike five miles Wednesday, I could only go 2 just last week, and I had to stop every .10 mile when I started. Today I went 3 and stopped once! I went 1 1/2 miles before I stopped! Just writing this I'm getting excited for what my life is transforming into! I'm sort of becoming my own cheerleader. Rah! Rah! Ree! Kick em in the knee! Rah! Rah! Rass! Make the choices that last! Go Team!
We also talked about my blog and about how I was feeling guilt over having more points than Melody. I do need to apologize at this point to my wonderful group. I forgot the rules and mentioned points. That is something I'll never do again! It got a good teasing over that one. After the yelling and laughter died down, they taught me how not to feel guilty. The other men in the group were real helpful with that. They taught me it wasn't healthy to skip eating and it wasn't helping either. I need to eat to lose weight. I'm already making progress in one day. Me and Melody went out of town to see our middle son in college at Weatherford, OK. We talked about the different places we could eat on the way and looked at all the options available to us. I actually used my points today. The bonus is I exercised twice today. Not only did I ride my bike 3 miles, me and Melody found this wonderful nature trail to walk. It was called Sand Plum Trail. I wish it would've been in season cause I could've ate healthy as we walked. The biggest bonus was I walked the whole trail with out stopping! Something I couldn't have done just two short weeks ago. So a day removed from what I thought was the end of the world, I feel more energized today than I have felt since I started this journey. Okay, I lost 1.4 lbs. this week, but I've lost a total of 18.2 in two weeks. That itself is awesome! I'm getting healthier and I'm getting in shape. That is something the scale can't do for me.
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